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Spred the Stupidity

 
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BallisticArse
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Joined: Dec 03, 2010
Posts: 543
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 6:15 pmPost subject: No icon Spred the Stupidity

Only in America do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in America do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in America do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in America do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Ever wonder why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why can't women    put on mascara with their mouths closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery?'

Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice?'

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?  

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes?  Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?



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MadMax
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 01, 2011 12:16 amPost subject: No icon Re: Spred the Stupidity

You park in the driveway while driving on the parkway...
Cargo goes by ship and shipment by car...


Interesting factoid though about braille keys on ATMs...

There is only one type a button made by the companies making them and it has braille for walk-up ATMs. The reason for this is because it would cost double to have the second machining line, etc, to make the keys without braille as well as with.

Although it is fun to pull up to the bank, get out with sunglasses and a walking cane to go use an ATM. People love to see you get out and start tapping the stick. lol

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 6:26 pmPost subject: No icon Re: Spred the Stupidity

MadMax wrote (View Post):

Although it is fun to pull up to the bank, get out with sunglasses and a walking cane to go use an ATM. People love to see you get out and start tapping the stick. lol


OMG I soooo could see you or Shooter doing that!

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Ghostrider
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 3:26 pmPost subject: No icon Re: Spred the Stupidity

Why does the word lisp have an S in it?


Do you know what the difference is between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The taste.

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Lumpy
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 3:40 pmPost subject: No icon Re: Spred the Stupidity

How come the only people who wear spandex are the only ones who really shouldn't?


“You never rise to the occasion, you fall to your level of training.”


        

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